God Whispers

Many times I have heard that God speaks in whispers. I have always answered that with, "Not in my world!" God has always been a loud, booming voice in my mind, or coming from the mouth of a friend or family memeber, or even a stranger. I learned this week HOW God whispers to me!
The idea of someone whispering to me, seems quite illogical. I can hardly make out the sound of my own voice over the din in my life most days. If it's not the TV, or the radio, or the kids, or the dogs next door, or any other number of things going on in the background, it's all the thoughts that are running around in my brain, even when I TRY to sit quietly!
In the last 2 weeks (of which have been insanely busy!) I have cried twice. Only twice, I swear! Once I knew why I was crying, but the second occasion, left me completely speachless. I had no explaination for the source of my tears.
I was re-assured by my many classmates that tears are the Holy Spirit's way of speaking to us, and it's ok to cry, tears are good signs. All of these things I had heard before and at that moment, while I felt utterly ridiculous for the outburst, these words still held little comfort.
I pondered throughout the rest of the afternoon, and well into the evening about why I seem to, oh so suddenly and inexplicable burst into tears, and frequently it seems.
It was last night, just before I dozed off, that the realization dawned on me! I know exactly WHY, or at least have a great theory about why, the tears where flowing AND where they were coming from, and I finally figured out what the Holy Spirit had to do with it all.
I will try to explain it but, as was uttered in class yesterday, God is too big for words! So here's my attempt. It seems that God perhaps would like to stop yelling at me (in spite of the fact that I love that way of clear, unmistakable communication). He wants to be able to whisper to me. The trouble is, I don't hear it. I think it might be because I'm not used to listening for it. (It's taken me 6 years to hear the yelling clearly!) My thought is, that God needs to get my attention some how so He sends the Holy Spirit to tug at my heart. That tugging causes tears. (I should mention, that crying in public is one of the most embarrassing, horrible things I could do!) By crying, I am humbled and in a position to really listen to what God is saying.
I still can't hear the message clearly, however. I think I will have to test out this theory and see where it leads.
Unexplained tears = God wants to whipser, Pay attention.
When the tears come for no logical reason, I need to really focus on what triggered them, and listen more closely for God's whipser.
I'm not saying that I'll cry less from now on (sorry folks!) but I think this might be a growing point for me.
I'm very excited to realize that the tears don't mean I'm completely insane after all!